A Very Tiny Play: #7

Well, here it is. The end of one solid week of writing a play every day. I might as well tell you I intend on doing this for another 13 weeks and 2 days.

(In a military circus tent)

QUEEN JENNIE: Insolent fools! Why do you come here with your guns and your bombs?

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: Your majesty, we have come to invade, steal your gold, and rape your men!

QUEEN JENNIE: Barbarism! And we, a peaceful nation!

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: Your majesty, your lack of army is precisely what drew us here.

QUEEN JENNIE: Base avarice! Who needs an army when we’ve got the greatest circus in the world?

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: Your majesty, your father needed that army to unite the clans – did he not?

QUEEN JENNIE: Obvious facts! We have united the KINGDOMS, and no longer need fighting. Circus is better!

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: Ah, your majesty, but not for fighting. Your majesty, we will accept your surrender under these, ah, terms.

QUEEN JENNIE: Screw your terms! Here’s what’s going down. You will all go home, and we will visit and provide free circus training for your whole army – no, no, your whole stupid nation! Anyone who wishes!

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: You wouldn’t! I mean, Your Majesty, that’s too generous –

QUEEN JENNIE: Preposterous! Generosity is infinite!

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: Such kindness… it cannot be! Your majesty, you’re lying! You just want us to go home. You are not to be trusted. I must report you refused our terms and are ready to start our inevitable crushing victory.

QUEEN JENNIE (now quite intense): Ambassador.

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: Y-yes, your highness?

QUEEN JENNIE: Tell your general (she whispers in the ambassador’s ear)

AMBASSADOR FROM KRENT: Your majesty! I am…. Yes. I will deliver your message. A thousand pardons, your majesty. I will go. I… thank you.

(The ambassador goes.)

QUEEN JENNIE: Great victory! The world will have another circus, and lose another army.

(She turns to watch her circus rehearse.)


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